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artists i have gotten into purely to impress girls

Updated: Sep 27, 2023

Have you ever changed aspects of your personality to fit in more with others? Dressed differently? Toned down your accent? Don’t worry, I have done all of the above, and more! In my quest for female validation and romantic prospects, my music taste has become a warped amalgamation of ‘all the girls I’ve loved before’, proving once again, that I probably have not had an original thought ever. Here is a selective list of artists who I first listened to purely to impress various girls.


1) Panic! At The Disco


Starting off strong, I first began listening to Panic! at the age of 15 at the pressure of an Instagram group chat of other quite gay teenagers. I would pretend to be very knowledgeable on the latest and greatest drama, such as the sexuality of one Brendon Urie, how socially acceptable it was to hate his wife, or how attractive Ryan Ross was. This is where I developed my very fast typing speed, as I was googling all these things live (very helpful in chasing essay deadlines today). Although I do not listen to very much of Panic! in comparison to the other musicians on this list, I can be found occasionally playing a song in nostalgic remembrance of those highly embarrassing times.


2) The 1975


A few months after my introduction to Urie and his everchanging cast list of band members, another couple of people were added to the Big Instagram Groupchat™, one of which I developed a huge crush for. Thus, I began listening to the 1975 – their favourite artist at the time - in an effort to relate to them, and quickly found I actually enjoyed the music, despite the mouthfuls their album titles seem to be. This had the unintended side effect of still being into the band when they were at their least fashionable – I argue this was 2020, when their widely regarded ‘worst album’ came out and Matty Healy was saying some politically incorrect things on Twitter. So, it is with slight shame that I announce the 1975 has consistently been in my top 3 most listened to artists for the past 5 or 6 years. I am sorry, Taylor Swift fans. I don’t really have a justification for this, apart from that I’m a sucker for indie.


3) King Princess


I am unsure where my yearlong obsession with King Princess came from, but I am 99% sure that a woman was involved. Having realised, that as a lesbian(ish), I should probably be supporting my fellow sapphic brethren, I went on a quest to find underground LGBTQ artists I could brag about to other sapphics. King Princess happened to be one of a few that I picked up. With songs like ‘1950’ and ‘Ain’t Together’, she was perfect material for my goals. However, I stopped listening to her for an extended period of time due to her being cancelled in some circles, which ruined my plans to seem cool and trendy.


4) Fletcher


My most recent acquisition into my playlists stolen from someone else, Fletcher is a hard pop lesbian who a few of my friends are into. Therefore, I am as well! You may call me spineless and a parasite of others’ Spotify profiles – I call myself a connoisseur discovering new things. My fairly recent inauguration to clubbing has made me like hard pop quite a bit. This probably ruins my street cred, but I’ll take that loss instead of discontinuing my weekly visits to Church Dundee for bingo. Songs such as ‘Becky’s So Hot’ and ‘Serial Heartbreaker’ have made their way into my top listened tracks for the past few months, which I am no longer mad about. I was worried about the destruction of my carefully crafted shoegaze/goth folk persona for a while, but I later realised that Madonna has also clambered her way into my playlists, making the moral of this story that club music is ok to listen to casually.


In conclusion, listen to what you like! Whether that is the emo band you got into with romantic intentions, or simply your dad’s vinyl collection he keeps around to look cool, music is subjective, and you will like what you like. Don’t be like me and deny yourself Madonna for the sake of the goth girl you’re into.


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erin

ID: King Princess performing at Royale Boston on January 25, 2019.


by erin (any)

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